Lounge Fight

Take me home
small goldness in the gloaming, growing
before you advertise
end times it should be cold outside

Jesus, don't cry
we're drinking and we're dancing
and I am not surprised
by kid stuff like Kurt Cobain

I took out my nosering today
I took out my nosering today

All dressed down
no glamour, careless holes in stockings
I miss those times
with all my friends in middle school

Suffer for fashion
see those friends in magazines
these are the times
when no one will admit they wanna be cool

and

I took out my nosering today
I took out my nosering today

Options

On the one hand I have
little foreigner born
of village tapestry sitting
grinding her teeth in worry
over stoplight looks
and wondering when she'll be
an American.

On the other hand I have the smallest
one of three, right now
strutting boardwalks and
grinning under a full
Miami sun, looking
up at the sky in anticipation --
she's still so young.




If I had a third hand he'd be there
my little brother/lover
who bites his nails.

X

I'm listening to your
ex girlfriend's music and
thinking about how much I want
to hold you and listen
to you saying silly things
stupid things
nothings

I'm looking at her pictures of you and
I wish that it was me
behind that lens even
in the pictures when you're crying
and I know it's her that
made you
but still
that's
nearer than I've ever been.

I'm thinking about your ex girlfriend
and wondering how she could have ever
even imagined
letting go.

I Just Want

I just want to be good enough
to like what I do and
to have it
be effortless, so easy for me
to create little bits
of things to love
and if I can't commit
to this how
can I ever spend my time
on you.

foundsong poem

Flying across the state line
I've nothing much to offer
you're tossing turning, dreams are murders
and I say
Wake up you sleepy head
while you whimpering
(stop me, oh stop me) relate:

He was smiling through his own personal hell
the railings of the bridge were moving by the glass
and the phantom appeared
to brush the dust of youth from off your shoulder
opening
his mouth to say
"I come from Boston, I'm gonna tell you all about
how I love New England, it's my favorite place.
It's automatic, I need to unload
'cause
I was born in a class-five hurricane
and I'm sick, you're tired,
let's dance."

So you tell me more how
all around the demons say
"That's what we try to do in our music."
They're terrible and
while avoiding them you notice
a thickset man
with frog eyes
standing at the door,
who makes you remember "ooh,
my cousin's friend's friend wanna meet me..."

I interrupt because I won't share you
after the glow,
the scene, the stage, the set, but
you forgot I was here; stuttering
"oh, hello."

I know when to go out
thrown like a star in my vast sleep
so I'll stop asking you
What do I need to do
to see myself in a better mood.

We're all working for the weekends.

for sarah

In the dream
I got a bluebird
and
I can see myself in your eyes
tinkling, words are flowing out
as tablas gambol
cymbals meandering
to flute twitter
so I wonder where you go with your broken heart
nodding along to whispering guitars
falling
to their deaths

mouth:
take my hand, I changed
my mind again so sing me
to sleep

I say
"This one's called Stella Was A Diver And She Was Always Down."
but you wonder, say
"You sure about that?" to my reply:

I found a road and off I sped
thinking last night it was so good,
learning to say the same thing.
This is not a love song
a lazy confession
distorted droning --
since I met you
inhaling crushed bones just to
stand up, I said
you've got to manage brothers
and sisters, barking dogs

oh my, naked eyes

this is why events unnerve me.
Girl I am afraid, where do his intentions lay?
Because your wine,
it
tastes
too sweet
but it's a motherfucker being here without you,,,


If you walk away I'll
walk away at the music heist

do you want to be free?
(because)
You're just the girl of my dreams
who knows alone the reasons
why you choose to be with me.

I know you're antiseptic

but...

Reality's a dream
how can we make you understand?

10 Rules For Combat

1. KNOW THYSELF
2. Understand your position. Before you can go into battle you have to understand what you're fighting for.
3. Set a goal that you're striving for. Conversely, set an anti-goal that is to be avoided at all costs.
4. Devise a method that will most effectively achieve said goal.
5. Make a back-up plan.
6. Consistency is key. Any deference from plan shows weaknesses and presents loopholes to the enemy, so pick the strategy that you understand will be most effective and DO NOT contradict it.
7. Be strong. Remind yourself as frequently as possible why you are doing what you're doing.
8. Don't over analyze the plan -- instead, choose this time as an opportunity to be dogmatic, no matter how much of a neo-Kantian pansy you may be.
9. Don't exhaust yourself. Worrying about attacks may work well for princes, but it does you no good to antagonize over the imaginary.
10. TRUST THYSELF

Did I?

She said I made a fool
of myself, that I was so
behind I though I was
ahead but lying here in the semi
darkness I know I've won; just
by being a lover of wisdom I
will beat her forever and she
calls me sophomoric
and a child,
anything she can get her
hands on but I remember
that time when she asked me
so politely
if I could edit her college essay.

December 26th

Every time I ask you
to go away
more and more even
to the point where I want you
deader than springtime
you,
you're
relentless like the winter
unforgiving like depression
that comes packaged in shining paper
and hopes held high for a better
and brighter future
that get dashed
every January when I see
broken toys on streetcorners
ordained by bits
of old tinsel, holding
out their plastic arms frozen
in the position
that says "want me."
Looking futile and feeling
worse I wipe my nose;
it's our Boxing Day.

o, internet

Every picture of you I see now
looks sad, your eyes
no longer in love like planets
orbiting some distant sun
that's in its red giant stage like
they already know what's coming to them
anyway so
they should really cut it out already.

And I noticed your cheeks
are fading
into your lips
like an old towel quietly soaking up
water
and even your hair
is depressing, leaving
your scalp in defeat
with roots black,
mourning.

a long time ago

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like
if I never met you
and I never let myself think
that we were friends
so that we could stay together forever.
I thought it would work but then
surprises came, needing
and holding onto in
that first nervous dark.
When I saw you up there I
said yes
you said yes
but then we both said no
no no no
and it grew
that no, until
with every absent look
and touch
it said, all it could say was
I miss that itchy dark
I miss that time before
we knew who each other were,
and it said
Go away stranger
who are you,
why are you saying yes?

It Is?

My password is strong
this is my moon and it said that
but I can only wonder as I grow dizzier
over hours piling up
this is my moon but
I feel weak and it's impossible
that anything could be strong here like
gravity, for example.

I watch comets, angels
people from a
bubble made of tyvek and old thoughts
that radiates out
around me and it feels good to
think that I'm safe here
and that nothing can touch me but
the reality is that everything
can, is always touching but
I can't touch back, even
my reflection won't,
she's too busy looking
in and whispering
at what are supposed to be stars
but is really just some stuff I hung up in my bedroom
to remind myself that other things
exist other than cold
black space,
but
it doesn't really work --
I can still see her and sometimes when
the loneliness gets palpable
I call her
You.