The Same Hands

This entire year has been a re-run
of all the stupid shit I already
thought I'd said and done. And
you can break my heart
'til the dawn comes;

I'll just pick up all the parts
and stuff them down in my pockets
until you think that they're all gone
and you've erased my fear of love
made manifest
in that broken old organ.

And I have held the same hands
for what's suddenly become four
whole years, tracing
the bones
and
fondling the broad palms,
soft as lambs' ears.

But really I know
no time at all has passed
between us, because
everyone leaves for so long:

spring through fall, still
circling the sun's sphere.

And even more harshly, each
decides they were wrong
and they want to come home,
but they'll only love me if
I've completely reformed and developed
telepathy, so
they never have to show me
all their hopes and fears and weaknesses
and we can live together, happy and
blindly
and never have problems
if we don't feel like talking.

And through all this leaving and
reuniting, I can't
grasp why no one will trust me
when I told them softly,
lightly,
that my love is a constant
like gravity.

Yet we repulse
one another yearly, drawing so
close only to find
with great shock and surprise,
our magnetism's contrived,
so we spiral off

to a new network of stars.

And I have held the same hands
for what's suddenly become four
whole years, tracing
the bones
and
fondling the broad palms,
soft as lambs' ears.

But there's one pair of hands
I'll probably never tough again, unless
we're reunited
by that great mystery,
tragedy,

and I have to comfort him
because we've been thrown together
(against our will)
by that force
that can only form death
and beauty.

But considering
my only chance of holding him
in my arms again
would be if one of our friends died, I'd
rather lie alone and whisper
myself a lullaby
made of all the tears we cried
in the corner of my room

underneath the God's eye.

And you can break my heart
'til the dawn comes;

I'll just pick up all the parts
and stuff them down in my pockets
until you think that they're all gone
and you've erased my fear of love
made manifest
in that broken old organ.

You've destroyed my heart just to help me
grow a new one.
You're destroying my heart
just to help me grow a new one.